This Simple but Fine Art of Showing Up

If I have a work shift of 5-8 massages on a busy day more often than not there are going to be a few clients with what I call "Wow Factor". For any number of reasons I'm amazed they are motivated to have a massage, make the appointment and show up. I am always glad they did.

In the last few months I have had a multitude of Wow Factor clients.

A beautiful young woman came in for an hour an half treatment this past weekend and let my know she had just been diagnosed with MS. She shared she was on medication for excessive convulsions and would take more medication if I was concerned said convulsions might "freak me out" (her words). I assured her that I prefer her not take more meds most especially for my benefit and that with her permission I would just work with and through the convulsions should they come. This is what she hoped for she told me so we began our session. There were a few minor convulsions which  we just went with the flow through and I found myself very grateful she was on that table because her traps and entire shoulder region were like rock. I wondered if it might be due to literally holding her breath and trying not to worry or upset other people with the inevitable convulsions. It touched me and saddened me that though she was in pain, discomfort and fear she was more concerned about the comfort factor of those around her. How happy I was to give her that time where the one and only thing to think about was her and how she might just feel good. I could feel her apprehension, anxiety, concern, and bone weariness. I could also feel her trance out with me and move into deep relaxation. All of this and still she shows up.

I then had the pleasure of knowing one of my long standing clients who comes every two weeks was in for the day and since she travels around the world on business and I have been traveling a little recently too, I haven't seen her for a while so I was happy to see her on the roster.  I was surprised to find her in a wheel chair  with cast on one foot and ankle and leg. It seems while in India she had missed a step and broke her foot. Not a petite woman and with the chair, the smallness of spa rooms, and the goal of not hitting or knocking her leg and foot against anything we were able to arrange her onto table.  I should mention she is one of my favorite people to work on, I love her particular body type and she is  capable of trusting and just letting me do my work which always makes for a pleasant session as care giver. As we work together often we have come to have custom and rituals that are exclusive to her sessions. I know her muscles and posture, breath rhythm and way she moves. A broken foot throws a distinct wrench into my beloved choreography of the familiar to say the least.

The fun part, I get to relearn her from scratch all over. The disconcerting part, what I think I know about her muscles and aches and pains has to be scrapped and ignored because everything is jangled and unsettled. I can even feel the distress of the foot in her spine which is usually quite fluid. This week her spine feels brittle and anxious. All of this and yet she showed up.

A while ago a dear long time friend brought me a young friend to work on who had been through many medical and healing procedures in his young life. An against all odds situation with a  very sweet spirited and interesting young man. I felt instantly a kin ship between us because we are united in whatever life tosses us we keep going, not only because it is the only option but because we love and enjoy life even with the indecipherable  and deeply painful appear. The doctors of this young man are as you can see from video below (used with both his and his mother's permission)  experimenting with bionics and literal bone replacement of the femur. You can see how the muscles, cells and skin with have to re-heal and re-grow. This is a boy who moves well and gracefully which I find interesting because he is so young and very tall, a combination which often renders one gangly. Not this guy, graceful with all this you see in his leg. Now, Im thinking this is  a kid who has already endured more medical attention and pain in his young life than most people will ever know, yet he is cheerful, interesting and interested, open and clear. I loved how he was able to clearly and directly convey he wanted very deep work and that it did not put him into pain or discomfort. I like that he had very clear needs and ideas for his massage and how he manages pain and his body settling around all of the new.

Most of all I love the fact, all this, and he shows up.

You know the old saying: More than half of life is just showing up.

I think yes yes, but what if showing up is daunting and requires iron willed determination. What if showing up is a herculean effort unto itself? What if the prize for showing up (in my case a massage) is moot to the very action and where with all that showing up requires. It seems to me this very journey of showing up is part of what makes the actual journey so worth the doing. I am sure you  can see gentle reader, how very grateful I am for all the various and eclectic individuals who endeavor and succeed in showing up to my table.

Yet another awe inspiring reason its so easy to love my work.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofKla2Rxi4o&feature=youtube_gdata_player

YouTube - Videos from this email

Pain & Other Riddles

One of the 9 million things I love about being a Massage Therapist is, I am routinely left in a sense of awe or respect or wonder or waves of love or humbled or just profoundly moved on some deep cellular level I don't begin to know how to articulate. There is magic in the world, I feel it every day from the cells of my clients and it leaves me in constant state of gratitude and reverence.


Today was a good day, I had 5 clients all of whom were pleasant and appreciative. Fun, upbeat work even though there is a snow front moving in which means my ears are ringing to beat the band and I will surely lose all the early blooms all over my gardens. 


There was one woman who was the herald of the day for why I do what I do.
I know from her charts she was in her early 70's and she just happened to also be a statuesque beauty.
Flawless porcelain skin, thick beautiful white shiny hair, classic and iconic bone structure and she came off as the epitome of health and well being except she has LDS or Lou Gehrig's Disease. 


Huh.   I often wonder how can such things even be? In her particular case it means she can not move her arms without swinging her entire torso with vigor.


I think about how much I loathe as a deaf person the fact I often must rely on others to facilitate communication with me or to me and how complex it is that even though the very people who do in my life are usually the people I love the most and know the best I still deeply resent my dependence and need. I am grateful, I am respectful and I am aware the generosity and sheer decency it takes for my loved ones to include me and make sure I both know whats going on and just converse with me. It remains a position I do not enjoy being in perpetually.


I mention my deaf resentment issues because, this woman had to ask me to remove her glasses, help  her disrobe, steady and guide her to table as her  balance and  direction control is compromised, square her on table and arrange her arms and hands around her torso in a manner that was not painful or contorted.
She had to communicate all of this intricate and exclusive choreography to someone who can not hear her in a dimly lit tiny room. She managed to do this with clarity, poise, directness and grace. Please tell me how anyone can pull that off in such a manner when they are facing the uncertain, the unfamiliar, extreme pain and looming over all of this is the very real possibility of miscommunication or misunderstanding on my part.


I always tell new people if they are experiencing any pain, too much pressure, discomfort or anxiety to raise their hand and I will both move on and become more aware.  How do I help someone who can't raise their hand communicate with me in the event of discomfort. The whole point of coming to me is to feel good. If you already are in mind bending pain, at the very least you want to feel comforted and for the pain in some way to be alleviated, certainly not aggravated because your massage therapist doesn't hear you say this or that is not working.


I told her what she I usually say and acknowledged that was silly in our case and how would she feel about raising her head if she needed to let me know anything immediately she laughed and raised her head.


She shared with me it was her birthday and I thought how fantastic she decided on a spa day to celebrate and how fortuitous for me that I happened to be on call today. She purred appreciation. Her smile was wry and wise. Her energy was both calm and high. You know those people who everyone around them feels better when they walk in the room. She is one of those people. While I was technically aware to take care in particular around her arms, emotionally I forgot while working we were dealing with something so huge and daunting because of the energy she was putting off which was so clear and bright.

Can there possibly be a better job in the world? I seriously doubt it, but if there is, I want to know!